A picture is worth...

Today was probably one of the most difficult days that we have had with our little man. He continues to wake up through the night often and just doesn't seem to be fully awake at any time during the day. His internal clock is fighting the adjustment. I told Travis that I just felt like I was spending the day keeping him awake, he said, "Well you are!" I guess that's true but I would much rather be playing. Isaac was very clingy today, he wanted to be in my arms all day and walking around, just in my lap wouldn't do. Travis returned to work today but not before being given a gift from his new son. Isaac said what seemed like Daddy as Travis left the room and when Travis came back in he was waving bye, bye. I can't imagine what is going on in the little guys head, everything is so strange, and I wonder how much he understands when we talk to him. He does understand no, as he has been told quite often since we have been home. No don't pull Anna's hair. No don't throw that. No don't touch that. No don't scratch Anna. He and Anna have a love, hate relationship at this point, but she continues to tell us how glad she is to have a baby brother.
Isaac is sleeping in his crib tonight for the first time, with me on the floor in his room. I am hoping that it will help him to sleep better to not be disturbed by my tossing and turning. We continue to try to do things that make his adjustment easier but I have to remember we have only been home 3 days. We have so much more to learn about each other and I can't wait to try.
In those moments when I am having to carry him around the house non-stop I find myself thinking about the wait, the dreams, God's amazing plan and I hold him just a little bit tighter. I know in a few weeks I will be able to articulate more freely the Amazing Grace that God's has shown us in all of this. Then I will be able to express some of my emotions that at this moment feel like a jumbled mess.

Here I am!

Bath time in Korea!

At our first meeting in the home of the foster family

Playing in the cabinet on Gotcha Day in our room

The main reason for this blog post you see above, many of you have been asking for pictures and we have finally received clearance to show them on a non-public sight. Travis said to choose just a few good pictures to share, I said, "He's my son they are all good!" We hope to be posting some video on Face Book a little later to give you a more true image.

Roller Coaster of Love

The past 48 hours have been a roller coaster ride.  Friday night at about 5:30 PM Kentucky time we were boarding a shuttle heading to the Incheon International Airport in Seoul, South Korea.  25 hours later we landed in Louisville, KY to celebrate with friends and family who had gathered at the airport to greet us.  Throughout those 25 hours the presence of God and the evidence of His grace was so very obvious to us and we are unashamedly grateful for that grace!

Both of us had resigned ourselves to the idea that the 12 1/2 hour flight from Seoul was going to be torturous for our party of three as well as the other 300 people on the plane when Isaac had finally had enough of being trapped in metal prison at 37,000 feet.  We dreaded the arrival of that moment but we were banking on Philippians 4:13 to carry us through and decided that we could endure pretty much anything for 12+ hours if it meant bringing our little boy home.  That moment never arrived. For 12 1/2 hours our little boy was a model citizen.  He had a couple of minor infractions, but nothing severe enough to be added to his permanent record.  To be honest, I think he handled the captivity better than myself or Bethany!

When we hit the ground in Dallas, TX we were dreading our 6 hour layover.  The layover began with us spending about hour waiting through the process of immigration and customs with a child who had already been awake for 16 hours.  Bethany and I were both so happy that he had managed to hold it together on the plane that we would've been totally cool with him melting down in the airport… but he never did.  He took it all in stride and when we got through all the paperwork, bag checks, security, etc. and finally arrived at our gate to wait out the remainder of our layover he took a bottle and passed out cold.  We took turns holding him while he slept, alternating whenever we lost all feeling in whichever arm he was currently resting on.  When we boarded the plane heading to Kentucky he let out a few yells to declare his disapproval of being on another air plane and then went right back to sleep… as did Daddy only without the screaming.  We tried our best to wake him up beginning about 30 minutes before we landed with no success and finally just decided our family would meet him asleep and be greeted by the fit we'd been expecting since boarding the first flight in Seoul.  Once again we were surprised when little man woke up on his own and decided to greet our family and friends with smiles and even hugs as he lunged from my arms into the arms of his Uncle Matt.

The finish line was in sight with only one hurdle left to clear... the car seat.  Most people in the USA don't give a second thought to putting an infant in a car seat, it's simply standard operating procedure.  That's all well and good until you realize that until the moment Isaac sat his behind in his Mamaw's van, he had never even SEEN a car seat much less been strapped into one.  After having personally ridden in several taxis while in Seoul, I would seriously consider strapping myself into a 5 point harness as well as donning a helmet and pads.  When we put Isaac in the seat he never made a sound other than the occasional laugh while playing peek-a-boo while we finished loading up.  He grumbled a little just outside of Etown, but just enough to remind us he was in the car.

Now we're home and it's like he's lived here all his life.  He's had a few moments here and there as he is slowly getting adjusted to the time change and rearranging his schedule, but he has assimilated himself into our family just like he was the missing piece of our puzzle.  He's even been reading his Bible as was evidenced by the way he greeted Bacon the wonder dog with an open mouth,  see Romans 16:16 for clarification.

Thanks to all of you who have been reading and praying for us along the way throughout this journey.  We would never have made it without you.  In the moments we needed them the most your prayers were answered and the value of those prayers to us could not be adequately expressed in words.  Please don't stop now though, and if there is one thing that I could ask of each and every one of you it would be that you add something to your prayers.  I would ask that you pray for the foster family who cared for our little boy for over a year as we waited for the process to play itself out and allow us to go and get him.  That foster family loved our little boy in such an amazing way and it shows with just how well he is doing in such a new and strange environment.  The emotions they are experiencing right now is likened to that of having a death in the family and the absence of Isaac in their family is a wound that won't quickly heal.  Pray that God surrounds their family with His love and speeds the healing process.  Pray that they re-enter the foster program so that another family might have their child being cared for in such a wonderful home.  Pray that we never forget the blessing of seeing first hand just how much our son was loved before we ever even entered the picture!

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27 NIV

Who's I Am

This will be the last blog entry from inside the borders of South Korea.  Tomorrow morning we get on a plane heading home to Kentucky and boy are we excited.  The idea of the flight is terrifying as we will be locked in the plane at 30,000 feet with our little boy whether he is in a good mood or not.  There is no escape for anyone should he decide that a meltdown is needed mid-flight and if bedtime is any indication, this little guy can bring the pain when it comes to throwing a fit.

Most of you know the story of how God had to change my heart when it came to the subject of adoption.  Before I met Bethany, the idea of adopting never would have crossed my mind for an instant.  It's funny how God often uses the things that we least expect to change our lives.  Looking back on the last 10 years, I can clearly see the way God worked a miracle to get me to Korea and I am so very thankful that He did.  If not for the grace of God, I would never have looked into the eyes of my son and fallen head over heels in love.  10 years ago I would never have believed the depth of love I could feel for someone I have only just met, but it is so unbelievably real!  The first time Bethany gave him a bottle and I sat on the couch staring into his eyes, I thought my heart was going to burst.  He just stared at me, his eyes never leaving mine... searching to see if I was all in or holding something back.

Since coming back to the guest house with us, Isaac has been a mamma's boy 100%.  He would play peek-a-boo with me or make faces with me, but he wouldn't sit with me or walk with me or let me hold him.  He would look at me from time to time and just stare into my eyes, still searching me out to see where we stood.  It's so hard not being able to communicate the way you want too with someone you love so very much.  I wanted to tell him that I'm not going anywhere, that I'm gonna love him forever and that there isn't anything in the world that will ever change that... but how do you do that when you're speaking a different language?  It turns out some things don't need words to be communicated.  This afternoon I was sitting in the floor while Isaac was sitting in the armchair with his mommy.  He was staring at me again and so I did my best to hold his gaze and not look away as he searched me once again.  All of a sudden he climbed down out of the chair and walked over to me and turned around and sat right down between my legs and leaned back against me.  I couldn't have soared higher if I had my wings!

Just a few months ago I got to attend the Simply Youth Ministry Conference when it came to Louisville, KY.  There was a guy by the name of Tim Timmons who came to lead us in worship several times throughout the conference and one of his songs that he used to lead us to God's throne is titled "Child of God".  When Isaac crossed the room today to sit between my legs and let me wrap him up in a hug a line from that song came screaming into my mind and re-confirmed to me that this was God's plan long before it ever became my plan.

"I am adopted in Christ, I can call you Father.  I walk with you dignified, with your sons and daughters.  You hold your hands out, you wrap me in your mercy and tell me Who's I am!"  Tim Timmons

I am writing this while laying beside our little guy from my IPod, I don't want there to be a chance that he wakes up with no one beside him! Sorry we didn't get to post last night, it was after 6pm before we arrived at the guest house with Isaac and we began to play immediately. Pick up went well, we were so much more than anxious and it was everything I could do not to let myself sprint to the building where he was. When we got to the building the elevator was so slow. Travis laughed as I was climbing the walls as the elevator stopped on every floor prior to us and even went to the basement before stopping in the lobby again. Finally we arrived on the adoption floor and guess what, he wasn't there yet! Our case worker said "maybe she is coming?" Turns out there was a traffic jam again which made her arrival about 30 min. late! So our caseworker put us in a small playroom to wait some more. When Isaac did arrive we recognized his voice long before we saw him. He recognized us right away and began playing. His foster mother had brought a bag full of things for him, from a toothbrush to little rice and see weed snacks, she was so very sweet, my heart just broke for her! She told us that the foster father had cried that morning and gave us the message to take care of this little boy! We were provided with all the import documents for travel, as well as plenty of bottles and formula to last our trip. When it was time to go we left the foster mother, she reached out for him again and he shook his head no. We all held it together in that final moment of goodbyes as the elevator closed. Isaac was all smiles as we left the building and walked 2 buildings down to our Seoul home. We feel very blessed to be able to be so close, many times the taxi rides are traumatic. Since then he has done pretty well, he played hard for over an hour before beginning to fuss. I told Travis he was acting sleepy and we checked his routine and it said he takes a nap at around 7:30 pm.
We gave him a bottle, looked into his eyes and he was out! The hardest part was waking up, it had to be strange waking up to weird looking people that you can't understand. It took awhile but I finally calmed him. The next episode was at bedtime but we all made it through praying for God's comfort on little man. Today we are just going to relax in our room, maybe take a short walk but not too much for tomorrow will be rough. Thanks for all your prayers. This really is a miracle of God!

A Tale of Two Days

What a difference a day makes!  Yesterday when we traveled to the foster family's home we were more than just a little bit anxious and when we arrived it took a little bit for Isaac to warm up to us.  When we finally all relaxed a little we were able to have a lot of fun and have a great visit full of smiles and laughter.  Skipping forward to today, we arrived at the Social Welfare Services building a few minutes early to find Isaac having fun in the play room.  When he saw Bethany walk around the corner I saw a smile break out across his face.  We went in and immediately started playing with our little boy.  He is 100% boy and a firecracker to boot!  He doesn't stick with any one activity more than just a few minutes before he is bounding off to get into something else, a lot like a little girl I know back at home.  Tomorrow is "Gotcha Day" and we can barely contain our excitement.  We've spoken to another family who is here at the same time adopting a little boy as well and found out that they have only met their little boy for about an hour and won't see him again until they pick him up for good on Friday with traveling plans on Saturday.  God has been so good to let us play with our little boy two days straight and to think we get to bring him back to our hotel tomorrow night and spend all day on Friday before traveling home on Saturday is wonderful.

We have moved out of the Renaissance Hotel and moved into the adoption guest house.  The accommodations are not nearly as nice as they were at the Renaissance, but they are perfect for what we need.  This afternoon we are planning to hop in a taxi and take a ride to the N Seoul Tower and spend a little time sight seeing.  Seoul is an amazing city that just seems to go on forever in every direction and as much fun as we are having it will sure be nice to get back to Kentucky and smell a little fresh air and taste some sweet tea... so if somebody wants to bring us a little bit of tea at the air port I won't be disappointed!

Love!

Let me just say right now that I am absolutely in love! You know that feeling you get when you have just gotten home from the most amazing date ever, the way you can't stop thinking about every moment, the way your stomach is in knots, and your eyes dance...that is exactly how I feel right now x 10,000!

We left our adoption agency around 1:30 pm and took about an hour drive to an area outside of Seoul. We went up the elevator and turned to the right and there he stood, the most precious little boy I have ever set my eyes on. We had been told that he was shy so we took it very slowly and kept some distance. I got out the ball I had brought and handed it to him. It took him a little while but he slowly began to warm up to us. While our caseworker talked to the foster mom to find out all the details about feeding, sleeping, likes and dislikes while we played! The first interaction that we had was when I kicked the ball to him (soccer player?). Travis rolled the ball to him on the floor and for the first time I heard his voice and saw a small smile. His voice melted my heart! Once he warmed up to us, wow, he was warm. Many of you remember how active Anna was at an early age (still is) he is definitely going to be able to keep up! I chased him from one thing to another, he took the case workers book and would have no part in letting it go, Travis says he has a Kungfoo grip! The caseworker wanted us to try to feed him some watermelon, he would not eat at first but then I was able to get him to take a few bites in between climbing, running, crawling and dancing. Yes, I said dancing, we learned that he loves music and loves to dance! We had told the caseworker about Anna and how much she likes to sing, she said that Anna could sing and Isaac could dance. My mind is already thinking about how much fun the two of them will have together very soon. I also know that Anna better be ready because this little boy is BUSY! The foster mom said he likes to fight with other children sometimes, and that he always wins! Here we go! I could go on forever describing how he smiled when Travis played peek-a-boo, or how he almost knocked the watermelon tray off of the table, but I will keep all of those memories close to my heart.

There is one more thing that I want to share about our visit today. When it was almost time to go I picked Isaac up and we looked out the window together. Travis put out his hands to hold him and in the cutest way possible he shook his head no. He eventually let Travis hold him for just a few seconds before leaning back for me again. But then the best moment ever, when it was time for us to go and his foster mom reached out to take him, he shook his head no again! I know it was hard for her but for me it was the icing on the cake. She reached out for him again in the elevator and he shook his head no again. Eventually she had to take him from me and I waved to him "see ya later."

We have another play date tomorrow per the foster mother's request since he is a little shy and then Thursday, May 24 will be our official Gotcha Day! We pick him up at 5:00 pm!

Now we have to prepare, I have no idea how we are going to handle that bundle of energy on the plane? We are going to the market later to buy a few things that we will probably need and then probably spend the rest of the night smiling and talking about OUR SON.

We have plenty of pictures but the blog is not completely secure so we do not want to post them at this time. Thanks for all of the prayers I definitely felt them today. Until next time...

While You Were Sleeping

We are finally here! We arrived in Seoul just before 4am Monday morning the 21st (we are 13 hrs ahead of Kentucky).  Our first flight to Atlanta went very well and allowed me to get used to it just a bit. We took off for Seoul at about 12:30 AM Sunday morning.  Wow, it was a very long and tight trip. The plane was absolutely packed, we had little to no leg room, and it was very hot! We suffered through it, looking at each other once in awhile and saying, "It will all be worth it!" I actually did much better than I expected, we watched many movies to pass the time. After landing in Seoul we waited for our luggage and then jumped on a bus to our hotel. We had no trouble finding the right bus, the airport is not very crowded at 4 am.
We were afraid we wouldn't be able to check in right away, but God is so good to us and he had it all worked out so that our room was ready and we checked in immediately. We were even told by the receptionist that he usually doesn't do this.
We quickly freshened up, made a few Skype/FaceTime calls and took a few hours to rest before our day of touring began. We tried to get directions via Subway to the bus stop, but after 5 min. of trying to explain it to us I said, "Should we just take a taxi?" We took a taxi to the north end of the city across the river from our hotel (our first ever taxi ride).
The taxi dropped us off at the bus stop but our attention was immediately diverted to a palace and a mountain landscape to our north. We decided to just take a short walk to begin our tour. Gyeongbokgung Palace was our first stop. The palace was amazing, it was like a city inside a city, seemingly never ending. We also were able to tour the Korean Folk Art Museum that was inside the palace walls.
We continued to walk through Seoul, it is a beautiful city, and very easy to navigate. We realized after several hours of walking that the bus tour didn't run on Mondays. We decided to continue with our one walking tour and took about a 20 min. walk to Namdaemun Market, an outdoor/indoor bargaining market. After our long day of walking and a little Korean KFC we were ready to head back to the hotel. Like the taxi traveling veterans we are, we flagged a taxi, gestured and handed him our hotel business card and we were on our way!
We are having a great time so far, it's hard to believe we just got here this morning. But as great of time as we are having now I can't wait until tomorrow when we finally get to meet our son! It is almost time!

Gyeongbokgung Palace

Look Mom, they have Ice Cream!

Outdoor Market